Saturday, September 6, 2008

not okay.

*WARNING: directed at a specific person. please disreguard.*

i'm tired of being the butt of jokes. its not funny anymore. my life does not exist for your entertainment. i have feelings and you've crushed them. no wonder i try to avoid you. when are you going to realize what you've done to me? i live in constant fear of what my future holds because i can't find the strength to ignore you. you think i'm over reacting. you think you've been a great parent. you've even told me that if i ever thought you'd treated me badly then i'm a fake and a phony and i'm lieing to myself. maybe you're right. maybe these tears are stupid and immature. that doesn't change how much i'm hurting right now. i hope you're happy.

1 comment:

McAngie said...

So I don't follow directions very well, I read it anyway. I'm sorry your having a rough time, just know that there are people out there who love you and care about you. But I understand how it is when you want that one person, just that one to be good to you. I've been there, done that, got my tshirt and went home. I'm 33 now and my whole 20's were filled with moments like this. A time in my life that I never want to revisit. If you ever need to just talk, hey, I'm here for you! You are a wonderful person and you stick up for yourself! Because if you don't take care of yourself, no one else will.