My sweet precious Zoe was one month old yesterday. It seems surreal to think she's already been a part of our family for a whole month. She's already outgrowing her newborn size clothes and the newborn size diapers. That's at least two weeks earlier than her big sister. All around she is a very different baby than Emberlynn was but I already knew that from pregnancy. It is amazing how even before they are born you can tell certain things about them. It also amazes me that even at this young age I can tell my girls have very different personalities. It's my job to love them for their differences and teach them to love themselves.
That also means I've been a mother of two for a month now. I wanted to take the time to jot down a few things I've learned as a not first time mother.
- I didn't appreciate the time I had with just Emberlynn enough. The transition to motherhood can be a rough one and it's so easy to feel completely overwhelmed. Then you add another child and think "Why did I think it was so hard to just have one?". I do not say this to take away from the mothers who only have one child, motherhood is challenging regardless of how many children you have. I've just learned that for myself, I should have spent more time appreciating just having one and not dwelling on the challenges. Now I get to try to apply this lesson to having two children.
- I'm stronger than I thought I was. Giving birth and balancing both little ones while the husband is deployed is hard are we're still adjusting but overall it's going better than I thought. Of course I'm sure God is the only reason I'm surviving.
- As chaotic as things are with two small children, I love how much more comfortable I am this time. Since I've already had a newborn it's easier to stay calm and realize when everything is okay and when I should worry.
- I need and love my husband more than I ever thought. It seems so surreal that we have now been blessed with two beautiful daughters. Doing this without him has made me appreciate him more than I ever thought possible. I really do believe this deployment is a turning point for our relationship. Things were kind of rough before he left but as long as we use this deployment to learn from the challenges and move forward, I feel like things can be so much better when he comes home.
Speaking of my last point, little Zoe being a month old means we're one month closer to Jesse coming home. We're not entirely sure when he'll be home but at least we're getting closer.