the love we deserve.

is it true? do we accept the love we think we deserve? to me this sounds like we sell ourselves short in relationships because we don't think we deserve better. i don't like that idea. there are amazing individuals out there who end up with abusive, unfaithful partners. i'm not talking about a one time lapse of judgement or loss of control, i mean repetitive hurtful acts. that's not fair, not that life is always fair, but it just saddens me. but sadly, many people do sell themselves short in the love department. they convince themselves that they can't do any better.

i think the reason it bothers me so much - as a married woman who, in theory, doesn't have to worry about it anymore - is because someday i hope to have children. i hate knowing that there is a possibility that they could get seriously hurt by someone they love. my mom was cheated on by all three of her husbands and the third also tried to kill her. every cousin on my dad's side of the family who has ever been married has likewise been divorced at least once. in fact, none of my cousins on that side of the family are married right now. most of them have been divorced multiple times. it is devastating to realize how little meaning love and marriage holds these days. the divorce rate is over fifty percent in this country...FIFTY PERCENT! this is the world i want to try to raise children in. i'm scared...