Monday, October 6, 2008
returning to youth...but not mine.
so last week was my last week in gravity. i'm officially becoming youth staff. i even attended my first meeting yesterday. perfect timing i guess. i'm excited but very nervous. my life is really crazy right now. i just don't feel like gravity is where i'm meant to be. i've loved being apart of its development but God has put a passion in my heart for youth. if i can keep just one teenager from going through what i went through then it will make it worth it. i'm finally ready for God to use my pain to protect and save others. i've kept it inside long enough. its time to let it go. as a high school student (especially freshman year and the first half of sophomore year) i felt so alone. i would blame it on not being a christian but i made most of my biggest mistakes after i was saved. i was young, depressed, and foolish. i can't go back and fix things. but even if i could, i don't think i would. those obstacles and failures have shaped me into who i am today. they help me appreciate the value of life, love, and the sacrifice God made for me. but i feel God has placed an obligation and a passion in my heart to make my suffering help more than just me. i owe him and our youth.